I believe in LOVE!

The past few days haven't been the easiest at work and I'm making a conscious effort to focus on the positives in my life and set up strict boundaries for the negatives.

In my reflections on the many blessings in my life, there is one that I sometimes take for granted....and that would be my husband Jimmy.

Nine years ago I met the man of my dreams on a complete fluke and even after we met, for months we went back and fourth because I wasn't sure if I liked him or if he was my "type".  He was a long haired rocker from the OC and I was a Latina from Compton! 

We chatted for months, I thought he was a nice guy and thought that we would be good friends because I wasn't really looking for much at that point in my life.  He was persistent and when he finally gave up on me, I went back looking for him because I missed him.  

Weeks later, three months or so from our first meeting, we finally kissed and the rest as they say was history.

Three months from that kiss we moved in together. 

Three years after meeting we got married on October 1st, 2005. 

Five months after that we welcomed our son Noah Layne Schultz into the world.

(Here he is with big brothers Saxon and William)

It has been a whirlwind romance and I never imagined that my life would be as it is right now.  We have had our many struggles, we have been through hell and back together, but no matter what our love was always there. 

Our 1st Wedding Anniversary at Lawry's

There were times where I didn't want to talk.  I was angry, I asked for space, i complained...he complained, but we have never raised our voices at each other and had a really bad, screaming fight...which is think is impressive after all this time.

I've never used foul language towards him.  I think I've called him a jerk at most a time or two.  We still have a high level of respect for each other.  We still talk things out.

He is an amazing father, he loves his children, he loves spending time with them.  He would give anything for ONE more....but I'm having a hard time with that right now.   I have seen him at his best as a father.  Late nights up, cleaning up baby "fluids" when I was gagging and couldn't...we have been through some funny stuff.  I remember the night we were both so exhausted with Noah that i got up and ran into the door because I was walking with my eyes closed.

He loves me for me.  Plus or minus 20 pounds, makeup or no makeup, happy or grumpy (but especially happy!).  He always tells me loves me, that I'm beautiful and he's still as affectionate with me as he was the day of that first kiss.  He makes me feel beautiful, even when I don't feel good about myself.

We have experienced so many things together

Here we are at Versailles in France

at a little cafe in France after a visit to the Catacombs

at his show at the Headbangers Open Air Festival in Germany

We may not have a lot of money but his gift of music has been a gift to me as well.  We have been able to travel because of it.  He has provided me with luxuries that I never saw myself experiencing and I appreciate him for that.   I am also very proud of him as an artist, he is amazing to watch!

I wish everyone love.   It takes work, but the payoff is amazing.

BOOKS!! BOOKS!!! BOOKS!!

My brother and I were having a conversation about books and bookstores on Monday morning...or the lack of...

Thanks to my Grandfather, i was a very early reader and learned a great LOVE of books early on.   You could travel to distant places, learn new things or shiver in fear....all while sitting on your couch or while laying in bed.

This is how I feel when I'm into a good book

It's comforting, it's exciting, it's fun.

I'm an especially big fan of the actual "physical" book.  Not kindles, not ipod readers and not computer books.  

Actual tangible books.

Books that you can hold, touch and smell.  There is nothing like turning the page to get to the next exciting part of the book!

Unfortunately, due to the rapid advancement of technology, bookstores are quickly becoming extinct.  It's so sad to me.   But even worse is that even with the availability of books on electronic readers, kids/teens do not seem to be excited about reading.

This world is all about instant gratification.  Why read 300 pages when you can watch the movie or worse yet...play the video game! I don't think so!

I was a proud mommy the other day when we were in the mall walking by a soon to be closed Borders and Noah yelled out BOOKSTORE!!! and ran inside.  We read every night and I'm glad that he will grow up knowing the excitement of books. 

Try curling up with a good book sometime soon.   Reacquaint yourself with an old friend!  Buy a book or better yet...go to my favorite place...the LIBRARY! It's even free.

For now, i will continue to build my home library (much to my husbands dismay).  One day I will have a room just dedicated to my collection of books...and yes....I have read them all.

...some even two or three times!

The ART of Happiness!

In these days and times, i am convinced that HAPPINESS is an artform that is slowly being lost.  Are you a MASTER of this art?  Well, if you're not...you should be working on it!

Why do we take this life for granted?  Why do we make the choice to stress and worry about so many things that we cannot change, while not giving a thought to things that we CAN change?

Yes, bills have to be paid and chores have to be done, but if you don't dust your furniture today and choose to go spend a day in the park with your child...is that bad? 

What about a date night with your significant other?

A dinner with your parents?

It's not always about money either.   You can pack a picnic basket, you can cook at your house and ask someone to watch your kids. 

You can create a trade off with other parents so you can all have a night out!  

Are you familiar with the effects of stress on the body? 

It's just not worth it. 

Take care of your business.  Make yourself a priority!  Enjoy this life. 

We only have ONE.

My how times have changed!

Wow!  It's been a while!  

As usual, my life has been hectic but GOOD hectic.  Well sort of...there have been some bumps in the road, but overall, I am blessed. 

First of all we moved!!!  Yay!  That was a CRAZY and tough move.   You don't realize how much stuff you accumulate until you have to downsize!  Oh man it took 3 full days...working ALL day long.  I just wanted to sit and cry on the last day.  No wait.  I did sit and cry.   It was a cry of "please let me get this done" and "wow our home with so many memories is sitting empty".  All and all, it has been a great move.  I am blessed with a very helpful sister, niece, father and neighbor.  Noah adjusted perfectly, he started Kindergarten last week and seems to love it.    We are all able to lean on each other when needed and it really is fun to not be so alone all the time.  Not to mention we have more money for things that we need.   I've been able to get dental work that I've needed for a few years, speaking of which, part 2 is today! YIKES!

I finally was able to get the guts to have my annual physical in July.   Everything was pretty much the same, same meds, nothing new.   I hadn't scheduled my mammogram follow up so Dr. Miller made sure that I did!  Headed down to Hoag Hospital last thursday and was informed that I was going to do the whole "annual" shabang!  So off I went to get topless and put on my plush spa robe. 

It was the usual for me, mammogram followed by an ultrasound.  Until the tech kept looking and looking....and looking.   She said some of the measurements seemed a little off so she took some extra images and off she went to show the Radiologist.   Dr. Levin came in a short time later (seemed like forever) and said that my lump had grown a bit so instead of continuing the every 6 month mammograms, they were going to do a biopsy to just get it taken care of once and for all.   My heart seemed to leap out of my chest when he said that.   I didn't expect it and it seemed like something was REALLY wrong!  Luckily my wonderful husband was in the waiting room and I was able to go out and cry to him. 

I thought they were going to have to schedule me for the biopsy but I was informed that they could "fit me in" that same day.  Not sure that I was prepared for it.  BUT, I wanted to just get it over with at that point.   My life was literally flashing before my eyes as I imagined worst case scenario.   Then they called my name....a wonderful older woman walked me in.   She could see that I was shaken and she held my hand and spoke to me gently.  I do believe that she was an angel sent from God.   She took me to the biopsy room and I I was introduced to the tech that was going to assist Dr. Levin.   She was HILARIOUS!  She reminded me of Jane Lynch in both looks and personality.  We were laughing like we'd known each other forever.  

The doctor came in they prepped me, took the biopsy (weird) and I watch the whole thing unfold on the ultrasound screen! 

After they wrapped me like a mummy which made me look like I had an A cup with two boobs at my shoulders!  It was so tight!  I had to wear this until friday night.  But Friday morning I decided it was way too much and switched to a sports bra.  I was pretty sore and it bruised pretty good.

So I'm sitting at my desk friday morning, I see an unfamiliar 949 number on my phone....so I answer.  My heart is racing because I'm thinking is it Hoag?!  I pick up and sure enough, it's Sandra from Hoag.  She said she wanted to follow up with me.   She asks me how I'm doing, if I'm bleeding or in pain, etc, etc.   She then pauses and says, "well we received your test results back and......".  My heart is RACING "the test was benign".  I immediately began crying.   She said it was the best call she had to make, i thanked her profusely and proceeded to call and text my family.   God is good and I am so thankful that I was blessed with good results.

NEVER take your health for granted

NEVER use fear as an excuse to not get check ups

NEVER ignore symptoms because you don't want to "deal"

If you catch things early you have a CHANCE

There is HOPE

GIVE YOURSELF A FIGHTING CHANCE!!!!

God bless you all.